When The First Became The Best

My first kiss was something out of a Nicholas Sparks novel. Okay, maybe not that intense, but I'd like to think it was. I was laying the grass stargazing with a friend of mine after a party, and our heads were touching and I think we were holding hands and talking about something mindless and then he sat up on one elbow and just leaned down and kissed me. It was short and sweet and of course me being the absolute goober that I am jumped up and ran away. I'm not kidding. Like beelined across the grass and left the party and frantically called my parents to come pick me up. It was the best first kiss anyone could ask for and I, naturally, screwed it up. Because I have the maturity of a nine year old who just discovered what nipples are. So I royally messed that up and I thought this guy would never talk to me again. We would briefly run into each other over the years and he took me out to dinner once, but nothing ever happened since that first kiss. Flash forward to present day. We reconnected a couple months back, and it so happened that we were going to be in the same city on the same weekend, so we decided to make an adventure out of it. You might remember one of my earlier posts about weekend getaways. This was with him. So I'm headed into the city and everything's fine and then I start panicking. Like full blown freaking the fuck out. What if he doesn't like me? What if we don't get along? What if the sex isn't good? What if we can't hold a conversation? What if I don't like his penis? What if he doesn't like my vagina? What if he doesn't like the fact that I smoke? What if this entire weekend was a mistake? I had a momentarily break down in true Beaker fashion.

I called my best friend. She told me to chill out, chew some gum, splash water on my face, and pull myself together. I am Gemma Daniels, damn it. I got to the hotel we were staying at and took five deep breaths before knocking on the door. He opened it, smiled, and hugged me. It was the best feeling in the world. I felt immediately at ease. There was something so familiar and so comforting about him that all of my worries vanished. I've known him for ten years, but I've known him for a combined time span of maybe two years out of those ten. So it wasn't that we were super close friends, it was really because he had been my first kiss. This is going to sound super creepy, but it felt like coming home in a way. I wish there was a better way to explain it, but it just felt right. So when we found ourselves frantically tearing at each other's clothes as we fell into bed after lunch, I wasn't nervous at all. In fact, I felt on top of the world. Our chemistry was so in sync and so explosive I was speechless once we finished.

It was the best sex I've ever had. And guess what? I got to have it all weekend long.

xx,

Gemma